October 1-5
October 1, 2023
I hope an M.A. in Music Performance involves shredding on đ¸
Happy October đđťđ
If your religion makes you treat your family like they have a disease you better be as great as Jesus
.@HawaiianTel Did you raise prices on everybody? You installed my internet 2 weeks ago and I just got a letter with my first bill saying it’s going up 50% on November 1 if I’m not on a promo rate. I’m on a promo rate for 2 years except for the Gateway Fee though. Bidenflation?
Habitual polluters probably don’t realize the cleanest time to do whatever we need to do away from home in America is on Sunday right when they open or right when they close, otherwise people treat the air like an open sewer (a phrase I got from Al Gore) like any other day. #usa
I only run if I’m playing a sport or being chased, but probably this https://spotify.link/HQrL0U5HxDb
@il0venostalgia @MrTeller
@il0venostalgia @MrBean
#tfw 8 pounds of honey you didn’t need anymore was late, so you canceled it and Amazon refunded you $60 and said keep the honey, then the honey was forwarded and taken by the Post Office (after attempted delivery) instead of left because they want more postage #usa #smdh #organic
@mariabartiromo @sundyfutures Waste all the time you want on trying to tie Joe Biden to his son’s crimes and other crimes, but instead of your wishful thinking you should be kicking Donald Trump to the curb for getting 92 felony charges, but I think you like barking up the wrong tree more than the right tree.
@NFL @stefondiggs Clowns
@senatorbennet Annexed regions in Ukraine voted to join the Russian federation. Ukraine has enacted anti-dissent laws during wartime that are usually considered illegal and anti-democratic. There’s a fight for democracy in Ukraine all right.
@ducaena These people barely know how to pay themselves for 6 weeks. #usa
@wallstreetslv Inheritance. Also, it’s nice to have shelter. Who cares who you write your check to? “Homeowners” carry debt and write monthly mortgage checks just like renters write rent checks.
@tcwesttitanfb #childabuse #cte #NFL
@davidjeremiah 0
@atrupar @facethenation @lindseygrahamsc should retire. Ukraine isn’t U.S.’ responsibility. Graham is barely speaking coherently. There goes Taiwan? Who does he think we are? What does he think this is? There’s no evidence that Russia has aspirations outside the outskirts of Ukraine too.
@ambjohnbolton Less money and weapons to Ukraine = more peace #usa
@ambjohnbolton No. You have a sickness and it can be seen whenever you open your mouth.
@ambjohnbolton Donald Trump has criminal charges because he took government documents to Florida and refused to return them when asked, but by all means lets assume Biden is the bad guy with Iranian connections that he isn’t supposed to have because people in government want to cripple Iran.
The country got dumber again this Sunday because of @NFL football and religion. Look the hell out Monday. #usa
Bad people say they need Jesus to be good people, but we’ll never know god
Your loved ones were fucking idiots on Sunday because of religion god
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My father keeps track of everything he gives me so accurately that it’s almost like he owes me Jesus
@rt_com Travel cleanly on land. Just because you have an option it doesn’t mean you must use it. I get free gas where I live, but I don’t use it because I don’t want to smell it and we shouldn’t import it to Hawaii when we can generate our renewable electricity. Fuck domestic air travel.
“C’mon. War helps our ratings.” – @CNN (paraphrasing the looks on their faces)
October 2, 2023
This account was suspended for 8 hours for a tweet to @POTUS. I appealed and they upheld it, so I deleted the tweet because they denied access. This account will be abandoned after the next suspension. All tweets are published every 6 months and titled like 2023 Quotes – Part 2.
@senatorbennet I’m not listening to this bs clown. Don’t give me your bizarre PC shtick for wanting to kill Russians in Ukraine with American weapons and money. That’s not how we solve problems. Grow up. Use your words. If you can’t end war with your words you won’t end it with your weapons.
X0_brandii * fallen
Wherever you are your eyes shouldn’t be exposed to bare lightbulbs, so find a lampshade and protect your eyes from strain and damage.
@openai If we are to take ChatGBT seriously how do we know that you aren’t selling ads to corporations and the facts it spits out aren’t just skewed to benefit those corporations (or philosophies)?
In my experience SD Bullion and APMEX are legitimate gold sellers, but JD Bullion and Provident Metals aren’t because they took my money and a week later they canceled the order and kept the money and said take it up with my bank if I want a refund. #usa #goldbars #beatit
You can’t be mysterious and a great teacher, but don’t worry because you’re neither god
There’s no excuse for death god
If you’re too afraid to state the ideal, then you’re not ready to lead.
I didn’t drink wine or any other alcoholic beverage yesterday because I finished a bottle the previous day and I’m not an alcoholic. If you drink every day you’re an alcoholic. đˇ #usa
@APA NFL #dsm6suggestions
Get enough sleep and add one hour to your sleep needs (e.g. 8 +1) for each drink of alcohol you have in your system when you go to sleep and drink plenty of clean water motherfuckers god
@AOC lol
@conanobrien @edsheeran Is he in the somebody please punch me in the face genre too god
Everybody has a lot and they’re afraid of losing it and want more, but I just want today and tomorrow god #usa
@madonna How much time do you have?
Mr. Bean and Teller meet the first aliens – movie idea
@ducaena Is the world big enough for U.S. interests?
@elonmusk I slept in a church pew in the Bowery and under a park bench, so they could always try there and I even talked a UPS Store into keeping an eye on a trash bag of things and guitar Jesus
@FFRF Enough 501(c)3s for batshit stuff #usa
@realprichard Bingo
@realprichard It was a long time ago whatever happened
I can’t imagine what this has to do with North Dakota
If god and the devil get equal time it sounds good to me #usa
@realprichard Marriage is an antiquated, unholy, religious ritual that has no use in society today ntm it’s unnatural and puts a yoke and burden on people that they don’t need and usually can’t live under which is why there are so many miserable failures and divorces in and out of church #usa
@realprichard #wrongtake
My bodily sovereignty trumps your hand whatever it is today and no matter how great it seems in your fundamentalist fog and echo chamber
Everything in my body is mine from cradle to grave and nobody else can have any of it, so don’t even ask
#prochoice
@realprichard That would be idiotic. You’re pushing your current religious beliefs on governments and governments don’t need it. Governments need the law.
Your 21st century, American rendition of Christianity is dumb. #usa
@potus No thanks. I want no insurance and no vaccines. I am betting on me! #usa #covid19
Are you playing with house money?
@realstewpeters @forexassassins Just another homeless music prodigy
#tfw you write documents titled How I Was Screwed and How I Overcame and succinctly list dozens of things by year #usa
When I tuned in to @CNN about 24 hours ago @maxfostercnn’s pouty face told me not funding Ukraine could mean less war or no war which is bad for ratings which he probably saw before the show. Am I getting warmer? In 15 minutes be the judge. See if Ukraine needs cash is #1 again.
Don’t take your eye off the ball Jesus
@ivan_8848 Don’t take your eye off the ball Jesus
@shanedemot * fatal womb
@tiffnic06 * an A King view
Democrats elect a president with the pope in his pocket and he still can’t make peace in Ukraine with Russia for over a year and a half and more people should think that’s unacceptable. @thedemocrats #usa @CNN đ @bianca_nobilo #msm
@potus No.
#wrongtake
Make peace. War has cost every single American a lot and I mean your war – the Ukraine war – that we’re hearing about and dealing with. End U.S. involvement in that nonsense and tell people to look inward and change their god damned ways starting with you. #usa
@ducaena What is Israel told them to for $200
@maziehirono Just rolls off the tongue
@rt_com India may have gotten lost because it’s so dark up there jk
This seems more like a matter of semantics and how/where the south part of the moon is located by definition
The way you worded this I thought China was skeptical of it happening
@christnnitemare Warm fuzzy placebos
#tfw you want to ride your bike to Safeway at 4 a.m. and wolf down a bag of popcorn or something for old time’s sake and because it’s the only thing open #usa
I’ve noticed a trend among some young people around their 20s-30s and they’ve gotten very slight nose jobs aka rhinoplasty to reshape their nose, but you can hardly tell sometimes. #usa
@pontifex No bonehead
I stressed about eating fresh fruit for Vitamin C, but when I found this Vitamin C spray 2-3 years ago I stopped needing fruit, so I eat seeds now, but not fruit or vegetables except on rare occasion. I alternate between @gardenofliferaw’s two flavors with 15 sprays/day. #organic
@almightygod The fish that swallowed Noah
@il0venostalgia Heh lol
October 3, 2023
@caitoz Don’t forget Poland
@peta I had a pure bred cocker spaniel puppy without health issues.
@sopjap @caitoz The Nazis were the German military in the early 1900s. Neo-Nazi groups exist today, but I think they’ve been forbidden around the world because Zionists often run things and make it illegal to be antisemitic wherever they can and use the Holocaust to justify overreach.
Sometimes one of your gods comes back to bite you in the ass. #usa
@padres @MLB 18 GB Jesus
@rt_com Catholicism has an open canon which means they can keep believing old dumb stuff and supplement it with new dumb stuff.
I’m stoked on buying organic almond butter for $9/pound (and how it gets here in 2 days) which means the almonds cost about $4/pound. 2,660 calories are in a pound which is 10-20% more than I eat in a day. I probably won’t eat just almond butter, but if I did it’d cost $7/day.
@rt_com lol
@bidenhq @gop @foxnews That’s your #1 guy #usa
@caitoz People talking about the need to give Ukraine weapons and money to kill Russians now in Ukraine sound a lot like people with religious beliefs that evangelize others. #usa
@ronfilipkowski Holy shit. I almost forgot. It’s time to find the big 4 late night shows and subscribe on YouTube. God damn. Sometimes I watch all 4 monologues. Fallon/Kimmel suck and Colbert is nuts. In fact, Fallon and Kimmel are insufferable a lot and so is Colbert about 1/2 of his monologue.
In his usual unpoetic way Donald Trump brought attention to the way liberal Democrats run late night TV comedy and they’re going to spend the next 400 days tearing him a new asshole. #usa
@sethmeyers đ¤
@nbc @nbcsnl It’s good to see your fundamentalist regime in motion again even if a NFL goon is hosting this week. Ask Slash to play.
@warclandestine Mentally ill capitalists don’t always know what they want the most because they want money a lot, but they also don’t want a reputation for being ruthless killers even if they’re killing Russians because that doesn’t play well to enough voters to keep getting reelected. #usa
At the medical marijuana shop you can tell who is in control of their own life and who is under somebody else’s thumb god
@colbertlateshow Is the monologue uploaded somewhere? I think I’d rather read it and avoid the fanfare. @stephenathome
@medvedevrussiae People are leaving Ukraine in droves and the ones that are still there in disputed regions have voted to join the Russian Federation, but by all means even though he couldn’t govern and protect those areas in the past since Joe Biden wants Volodymyr Zelensky in charge it’s gospel
@davidjeremiah Religious people destroy everything and they start with god
@nirvanaslyric * Meat-eating orc kids, “Forgive no one just yet”
Shout out to @Amazon agents for chatting online at odd hours over a few days about missing items that were lost in transit and graciously and expeditiously making it right. #usa
If my plants like you, then I like you god
“People will think you’re gay if you wear pink.” – mom in my early teens
@foxnews @foxfriendsfirst I think that Donald Trump stands to serve so many years in prison that he’ll change the way that people use the word trump. @toddpiro đ @gop #usa
Some people assume why Jesus was homeless, but nobody knows god
@speakermccarthy Nuts nuts want another nut that’s not as close to the other nuts, but take heart you’re still nuts and your nuts still have a place for you and now they can find the perfect nut, so you can get on with your nutty meetings and stuff. #usa @kasie đ @CNN
#tfw it’s barely after midnight
@cnnthismorning @poppyharlowcnn They never stop talking, so they shouldn’t have too much trouble finding a speaker. #usa #gop
Don’t be a dick god #prochoice #usa
If you can’t assemble the coffee table I imagine it becomes the coffee floor
@realprichard Burger King is more of a king than Jesus #usa
@christnnitemare Jewish girl left behind starts video lol
If that many people are gone somebody may want to see who developed the vaporizing weapon
If you are anti-gay, then you probably think too highly of your gender. #lgbtq
@APA People that use a male pronoun for god #dsm6suggestions
#tfw you must hang things straight on walls
Shout out to all the college students holed away in a dorm somewhere and good luck.
@wagnertonight I don’t think he wanted the job anymore
October 5, 2023
@atrupar I’ve tried to avoid everything Trump, but when TV news has snuck him into a segment before I’ve changed the channel he has sounded like a man at the end of his rope. #usa #msm
@wiseconnector Spam
@atrupar Ron DeSantis’ campaign depends on Donald Trump’s incarceration and I suppose he can’t stop running because there’s a chance that Trump will be behind bars and some Republican voters will think it’s too restrictive in prison as president and they won’t vote for him. #usa
@atrupar Donald Trump looks like he needs to change his diaper. #usa
Shout out to everybody that remembers how their ex, their family, etc. are a bunch of total losers every time they think about their child. #usa
#tfw today is the day
@donaldtrumpjr Ikr, well remember the way #msm covered #covid19 on a daily basis because they did that right up until they began covering the conflict in Ukraine and in retrospect leaving Afghanistan when and how they did may suggest Democrats and Biden knew they needed to focus on Ukraine.
@donaldjtrumpjr @realnewsapp Has your dad mentioned which state prison he’d prefer or whether he’d prefer federal prison? Has he looked at the menus? #usa
@warclandestine As if anybody needed another reason to leave the country #usa
@mkraju Well, Hallelujah. Now back to Endor.
@georgetakei Maybe they just can’t do math like the people that wrote the Bible
@fpleitgencnn @cnn I just saw a few minutes of your war coverage for the first time in a long time and it answers the question why should U.S. stop giving military aid to Ukraine and I didn’t even have to watch all of it, so thanks for making it obvious to anybody with a brain why we’re done. #msm
@fpleitgencnn @cnn @potus @joebiden Tell me more about your commitment to environmentalism and ending gun violence #usa
@potus Back up. We have a country full of morons. Let the government pay for college like it pays for high school and you’ll solve this problem without making half the idiots angry. #usa
YOUR WHAT HURTS GOD
@mikepompeo Do you play cornhole?
@grcastleberry Hold every hair captive @greglaurie
@jhsdachurch If god is on Hawaiian time and musician time, then we may be on the same time
@sanothomas Who took his job less seriously than Dianne Feinstein
@papalsupremacy Who lived longer after he quit being pope than he was pope
@cnalive Who had a unique connection with god for eight years, then said you can have it I am outta here
@alexemmons2430 * hall o’ lies
@pdalm_ * ewe
@martinjende * ewe
@georgetakei The liberal agenda’s subjective morality and us vs. them mentality works increasingly worse in an increasingly smaller world
It’s a shame that there aren’t enough Russians in the U.S. or Jews in Russia to make the U.S. care enough about everybody involved in the Ukraine conflict
@kamalaharris Canola oil was designed to lubricate machines
Cops have no place abusing people, pigs have no place destroying crops and government has no place antagonizing half the world with unmonitored borders
It’s time to stop talking about renewing the “assault” (propaganda) weapons ban
@blink182 lol can’t wait and stoked you’re killin’ it đ¤
@thatericalper Big Time is one of his best songs and Red Rain is rad too
@georgetakei Pick up your tin can with the string and talk some sense into @elonmusk
@caitoz Duly noted
@emeraldrobinson @laralogan Not any more chaos than the 2019 Novel Coronavirus and Republicans trying to stop the certification of the country’s votes for president with violence. #usa #gop
Have you ever drank @KckngHrseCoffee? I ordered their medium and dark organic varieties and they arrived today (along with a coffee table). âď¸
Are you really living before you have a coffee table?
* These tweets and many more will be included in 2023 Quotes – Part 2 and published in January 2024.